We are

 Song of the day;;

→ Young Empires - The Gates

No, I won't lose hope

No, I won't lose sight

But heaven is a place I just can't find

Run from the shadows and run to the light

Running from a past I left behind

Haunted by a memory that I just can't set free

Searching for the man that I used to be

I've made my sacrifice in the ashes of bad life

But heaven is a place I just can't find

And I can feel it in my bones

Every time I think of home

(You're not alone, you're not alone, you're not alone)

It still haunts me like a ghost

But I know we're not alone

(You're not alone, you're not alone, you're not alone)

No, I can't lose hope

No, I won't lose sight

And I won't stop looking for heaven's light

I hear the angels singing when I close my eyes

And I can hear the bells ringing like a siren's cry

Now I'm standing at the gates

And I just can't escape

Heaven is a place that I can't find

And I can feel it in my bones

Every time I think of home

(You're not alone, you're not alone, you're not alone)

It still haunts me like a ghost

But I know we're not alone

(You're not alone, you're not alone, you're not alone)

(You're not alone, you're not alone)

(You're not alone, you're not alone)

And I can feel it in my bones

Every time I think of home

And it still haunts me like a ghost

But I know we're not alone

(You're not alone, you're not alone)

(You're not alone, you're not alone)

(You're not alone, you're not alone)

(You're not alone, you're not alone)

Lion

 Song of the day;;

→ Martin O'Donnell & Michael Salvatori - Opening Suite

Dead bite

 Song of the day;;

→ In Flames - Call My Name

You don't remember so I need to figure it out

But the memories fade

The truth is that I'm not so sure if we make it at all

I can't even trust myself

I used to have it all

Until I lost control

I used to have it all

Until I lost control

Why don't you call my name?

Let it bounce between the walls, through the halls of time

A sign for me to go by

So find me the wormhole so that I can be by your side

Sometimes I'm angry, and some days I'm totally numb

I just wanna give it all up

Why don't you call my name?

Let it bounce between the walls, through the halls of time

A sign for me to go by

So find me the wormhole so that I can be by your side

I used to have it all

Until I lost control

I used to have it all

Until I lost control

Why don't you call my name?

Let it bounce between the walls, through the halls of time

A sign for me to go by

So find me the wormhole so that I can be by your side

So find me the wormhole so that I can be by your side

So find me the wormhole so that I can be by your side

Until I lost control

Until I lost control

When I dream

 Song of the day;;

→ Ambientalism & Stefan Mothander - Water Clouds

--

Porukat oli tosiaan yötä täällä ja lähtivät tänä aamuna. Kävin lenkillä kun kerrankin oli satamatta (tai no, pieni kuuro tuli matkalla mut se nyt ei haittaa). Maanantaina on fysioterapia.

Run

 Song of the day;;

→ Bear In Heaven - Lovesick Teenagers

Looking to the right

Our turn goes by

But not for too long

Our destination

By our misfortune

We are pulling past

Per the hour

But not for too long

So just embrace it

Our destination

Driving away from the high road

We should find a flock of birds big enough

To pull us up from the low road

Come on

Come with us

We are falling straight down, so turn us up

Loud and clear

Before we crash into the ground

Lovesick teenagers

Don't ever die

They will live forever

Even when you're too old

And you think you know more

And you know you know more

You'll be

Driving away from the high road

We should find a flock of birds big enough

To pull us up from the low road

Come on

Come with us

We are falling straight down, so turn us up

Loud and clear

Before we crash into the ground

Driving away from the high road

We should find a flock of birds big enough

To pull us up from the low road

Come on

Come with us

We are falling straight down, so turn us up

Loud and clear

Before we crash into the ground

--

Oli alun perin tarkotus, että porukat veis mut lauantaina takas Ouluun, mut tarkemman suunnittelun jälkeen päädyttiin tekemään niin, että ne viekin mut perjantaina ja on sitten yötä mun luona ja ajelevat lauantaina takas. Se onkin ihan hyvä, ei tarvi niittenkään ajaa sitten niin paljon työviikon jälkeen yhteen putkeen ja mäkin saan viettää vielä aikaa Runtin ja niitten kanssa.

The darkness of my mind

 Song of the day;;

→ Temples - Shelter Song

One night

You came on over to me

Late night

We shared a drink or three

Night night

I read a proverb to you

That night

She left a room with a view

Take all the time

Time that you want to

Make up your mind

Mind how you go

Take me in time

Time to the music

Take me away to the twilight zone

Last night

We stayed up late in a dream

My oh my

We read a play with no theme

Lifetime

In which our love pursues

My time

In which I spend with you

Now I know the lonely days are gone

Don't you know that I can see

Like a summer day that's always long

We repel the wet of tears

As the shadows lighten up the day

Through the cons we laugh away

Like a windy day that's always wrong

We take shelter where we can

Last night

I came on over to you

My oh my

We played a song or two

Lifetime

I read a poem aloud

My time

I wrote a song for thee

Now I know the lonely days are gone

Don't you know that I can see

Like a summer day that's always long

We repel the wet of tears

As the shadows lighten up the day

Through the cons we laugh away

Like a windy day that's always wrong

We take shelter where we can

Cease all your fire

 Song of the day;;

→ Demon Hunter - On My Side

I’ve been waiting

Give me a sign

There’s nothing left to face

Only the time

I see shadows

Devils, decline

I’ve lost my faith in us

Found my design

So now

Where is the enemy?

I can feel no bite

Where is the enemy

When death is on my side?

Something building

Raging inside

This hope gave me release

Gave me a why (Gave me a why)

Can’t shake this ground beneath

I came to fight

So now

Where is the enemy?

I can feel no bite

Where is the enemy

When death is on my side?

Where is the enemy?

I can feel no bite

Where is the enemy

When death is on my side?

Consuming victory

The trumpets calling out to me by name

By name

No looming debt for me

No, death will find his aim to be in vain

In vain

So now

Where is the enemy?

I can feel no bite

Where is the enemy

When death is on my side?

Beneath the sun

 Song of the day;;

→ Innere Tueren - Return Forever

The thing that's killing me

 Song of the day;;

→ Strawberry Guy - What Would I Do?

I can tell that the grass is greener

On the other side, with you

I wouldn't know, what to do without you

Stay by my side eternally

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do?

I can tell, that the water’s clearer

On the other side, with you

I know you care, about the faults in my life

Just promise me this, stay with me

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do?

What would I do

Without someone like you?

What would I do?

Rise above the tides

 Song of the day;;

→ Editors - The Racing Rats

When the time comes

You're no longer here

Fall down to my knees

Begin my nightmare

Words spill from my drunken mouth

I just can't keep them all in

I keep up with the racing rats

And do my best to win

Slow down little one

You can't keep running away

You mustn't go outside yet

It's not your time to play

Standing at the edge of your town

With the skyline in your eyes

Reaching up to God

The sun says its goodbyes

If a plane were to fall from the sky

How big a hole would it leave

In the surface of the earth?

Let's pretend we never met

Let's pretend we're on our own

We live different lives

Until our cover's blown

I push my hand up to the sky

Shade my eyes from the sun

As the dust settles around me

Suddenly nighttime has begun

If a plane were to fall from the sky

How big a hole would it leave

In the surface of the earth?

The surface of the earth?

Come on now, you knew you were lost

But you carried on anyway

Oh come on now, you knew you had no time

But you let the day drift away

If a plane were to fall from the sky

How big a hole would it leave?

If a plane were to fall from the sky

How big a hole would it make

In the surface of the earth?

The surface of the earth?

The surface of the earth?

Until the world goes cold

 Song of the day;;

→ Northlane - Talking Heads

Tiptoe through the ruins of my mind

Desolation in disguise

I've been locked out of my thoughts for a long time

The rusted gates deteriorate

Do my insecurities relate?

It’s like I'm waiting to fall apart, to fall apart

Waiting to fall, waiting to fall

Waiting to fall apart

My eyes are a sight below the surface

The veil's wearing thin

I don’t fit into my skin

Maybe I'm just like the rest of them

But I refuse to take the medicine

To escape the mess I'm in

Outspoken by the voices in my head

The voices in my head

My mind is silenced by the talking heads

Chattering at me with every waking breath

My eyes are a sight below, these voices I can't put to rest

My eyes are a sight below, the veil's wearing thin

I don't fit into my skin

Maybe I'm just like the rest of them

But I refuse to take the medicine

To escape the mess I'm in

Outspoken by the voices in my head

The voices in my head

My mind is silenced by the talking heads

Drowning out reason, drowning in lament

My mind is silenced by the talking heads

Outspoken by the voices in my head

Outspoken by the voices in my head, fuck

My mind is silenced by the talking heads

Chattering with every waking breath

My mind is silenced by the talking heads

Outspoken by the voices in my head

Pull me from the void

 Song of the day;;

→ Yorokobi - Sphere

The ghost that's haunting you

 Song of the day;;

→ Slowdive - Star Roving

Give it away now, girl

Can't hold down tonight

Every black and white

Secret's a blinking light

Emma flies a kite

Said she's feeling love for everyone tonight

Although possible

Said she's feeling good, said she's feeling good

Smiling beautiful

She says I make it best

For everyone to hide

Twisting around my girl

Nothing left to lose

Nothing left to fight

Give it away now, girl

Can't hold on to mine

Every black and white

Secret's seeking light

In a flash of time

Said she's feeling love for everyone tonight

Smiling beautiful

She says I make it best for everyone tonight

Dead and gone

 Song of the day;;

→ Steve Jablonsky - Arrival to Earth

Blind leading the blind

 Song of the day;;

→ In Flames - Voices

Could you be the angel left in the dark?

It's mostly silence echoing through the halls

Kill the hunt instead of lying to myself?

For long I've seen the signs written on these walls

Written on these walls

I will search, search through the wreckage of my soul

Believe in what I have 'cause that's, that's all I am

That's all I am

I swear I could hear

Voices from the edge of the Earth

Reminding myself to breathe slow

Wandering alone in this wasteland we used to call home

Could you be the devil left in my heart?

All these feelings, I wish I could turn them off

Kill the hunt instead of lying to myself?

For long I've seen the signs written on these walls

Written on these walls

I swear I could hear

Voices from the edge of the Earth

Reminding myself to breathe slow

Wandering alone in this wasteland we used to call home

I will search, search through the wreckage of my soul

Believe in what I have 'cause that's, that's all I am

I swear I could hear

Voices from the edge of the Earth

Reminding myself to breathe slow

Wandering alone in this wasteland we used to call home

We used to call home

I swear I could hear

Voices from the edge of the Earth

Silence in the snow

 Song of the day;;

→ Kelly Moran - Autowave

Snøfall

 Song of the day;;

→ Night Riots - All for You

When you're away

I'll be losing sleep

A mother crying on the TV

The world is suffering

I've had enough

I need your innocence

Don't let up

Just give me your love

Give me your release

I need your healing with your touch

I can take it, I can all take the pain

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

You are quiet

In a world so full of noise

I'll be the shoulder you cry on

I'll always hear your voice

Full of desire

You love, you laugh, you dream

I'll give you healing with my touch

I can take it, I can take all your pain

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

Our love will never fade

You're the star in an early dawn

Forever in the twilight

Like a diamond in the calm

You're the moon

On a cold grey sea

You light the way

Always guiding me

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

It's all for you, for you, for you

It's always been for you

--

Kävi nyt niin, että suunnitelmat muuttui aivan täysin lennosta (sanon suunnitelmat ihan niin kuin mulla olisi jotain aktuaalisia suunnitelmia) ja porukat kävi hakemassa mut tänään kotiin. Niillä on molemmilla ens viikolla iltavuoro, eikä mun sisko oo vielä pistänyt Runtille kertaakaan insuliinia, joten meikäläistä tarvitaan. Olisin mä tietysti tullut vaikka mulla olisikin ollut jotain, sillä Runtti on mun ykkösprioriteetti ja mä tekisin sen vuoksi mitä tahansa. Oon nyt sitten näillä näkymin pari viikkoa täällä, mikä on kyllä kiva.

Remember every scar

 Song of the day;;

→ Hans Zimmer & James Newton Howard - Eptesicus

--

Tänään oli fysioterapia ja sen jälkeen kävin tosiaan Suomalaisessa ostamassa uusia kyniä. Keli oli ihana joten kävin myös lenkillä, tuntu jotenkin tosi hyvältä.

My songs know what you did in the dark (Light em up)

 Song of the day;;

→ Trivium - I Don't Wanna Be Me

I don't wanna be

I don't wanna be me

I don't wanna be

Me anymore, more

Ever throwing at his home

Two glass houses, twenty stones

Fourteen yellow, six are blue

Could it be worse? Quite doubtful

I don't wanna be

I don't wanna be me

I don't wanna be

Me anymore

One, two

One, two, three, four

Two steps forward, three steps back

Without warning, heart attack

He fell asleep in the snow

Never woke up, died alone

I don't wanna be

I don't wanna be me

I don't wanna be

Me anymore

One, two

One, two, three, four

Please don't dress in black

When you're at his wake

Don't go there to mourn

But to celebrate

Please don't dress in black

When you're at his wake

Don't go there to mourn

But to celebrate

I don't wanna be

I don't wanna be me

I don't wanna be

Me anymore

One, two

One, two, three, four

I don't wanna be (I don't wanna be)

I don't wanna be me (wanna be me)

I don't wanna be (I don't wanna be)

Me anymore

I don't wanna be (I don't wanna be)

I don't wanna be me (wanna be me)

I don't wanna be (I don't wanna be)

Me anymore

--

Sain tiskattua tänään, joten palkitsen itseni huomenna fysioterapian jälkeen sillä, että menen käymään Suomalaisessa Kirjakaupassa ja ostan itelleni jotain kivoja uusia kyniä.

Undivided

 Song of the day;;

→ Roger Eno - Voices

--

Tänään oli jo ihan normaali olo, joten pääsin käymään kaupassa (tiskata en vielä jaksanu mut sen nyt ehtii huomennakin). Keli oli ihan vitun paska, satoi vettä ja ukkostikin vähän, joten en käyny lenkillä. Sain kuitenkin jostain jonkin ihmeellisen energiapiikin ja sain siivottua ja järjesteltyä tän mun kirjotuspöydän ekaa kertaa sitten muuton jälkeen.

I won't give in

 Song of the day;;

→ STRFKR - While I'm Alive

Last night all black and white when I was sleeping

I felt shadows and emptiness surround me

Just keep telling myself to live my life alive

Like everything else just keep on breathing and live

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

While I'm alive

I live my life

While I'm alive

The colours and the sound

While I'm alive

I live my life

While I'm alive

Saw the way I would die

While I was dreaming

Cold but hearing the sound

That a heart beats

Keep on telling myself to live my life alive

Like everything else

Just keep on breathing and live

While I'm alive

I live my life

While I'm alive

The colours and the sound

While I'm alive

I live my life

While I'm alive

While I'm alive, uh, oh, oh

While I'm alive

While I'm alive

While I'm alive

While I'm alive

--

Ulkona ois ollu tänään aivan ihana sää, mutta mulla oli sen verran huono ja heikko olo vielä etten mitenkään pystyny menemään lenkille. Vituttaahan se.

Oh no

 Song of the day;;

→ Damien Rice - Cannonball

Still a little bit of your taste in my mouth

Still a little bit of you laced with my doubt

Still a little hard to say what's going on

Still a little bit of your ghost, your witness

Still a little bit of your face I haven't kissed

You step a little closer each day

That I can't say what's going on

Stones taught me to fly

Love, it taught me to lie

Life, it taught me to die

So it's not hard to fall

When you float like a cannonball

Still a little bit of your song in my ear

Still a little bit of your words I long to hear

You step a little closer to me

So close that I can't see what's going on

Stones taught me to fly

Love, it taught me to lie

And life taught me to die

So it's not hard to fall

When you float like a cannon

Stones taught me to fly

Love, it taught me to cry

So come on, courage

Teach me to be shy

'Cause it's not hard to fall

And I don't wanna scare her

It's not hard to fall

And I don't wanna lose

It's not hard to grow

When you know that you just don't know

--

Jouduin perumaan sairaanhoitajan ajan kun iski migreenillä ja kunnolla iskikin, en pystyny oikein tekemään mitään koko päivänä ja nyt väsyttää. Onneks kohta pääsee nukkumaan.

Blasphemy

 Song of the day;;

→ Whitechapel - Hickory Creek

It's so hard to let go

You can hear me but I'm invisible

But if you dig out your eyes, maybe pain will subside

The worst that could happen is you never see me again

But the worst is yet to come, my friend

This path I walk is comforting

But now I'm left to sing this song alone

I'm fading faster now

I left so long ago

You never noticed I was gone

Now that you don't have eyes, maybe now you'll realize

Within your own head, you're creating these lies

For what it's worth, you're still beautiful

But beauty lies within the eyes

This path I walk is comforting

But now I'm left to sing this song alone

I'm fading faster now

It's time to walk away with nothing left

Nothing left in my soul

I've faded into myself

This path I walk is comforting

But now I'm left to sing this song alone

I'm fading faster now

It's time to walk away with nothing left

Nothing left in my soul

I'm fading faster now

--

Huomenna on sairaanhoitajan aika. Sen jälkeen pitäis tiskata. Tänään oli aika hyvä päivä, tein tosi paljon asioita ja nyt väsyttää ihan vitusti. Miten ihmiset tekee juttuja joka päivä?

Drown

 Song of the day;;

→ Borghild Wenn - Filotimo

Run

 Song of the day;;

→ Grizzly Bear - Mourning Sound

I made a mistake

I should have never tried

I took the cake

Finished every slice

I moved away

Still paying off the fines

For every day

That I shared, I left a lie

I stare at my face

Looking through my eyes

I move at a pace

That I cannot survive

I'm holing away

I do it all the time

Let love age

And watch it burn out and die

I woke to the sound of dogs

To the sound of distant shots and passing trucks

We walked with the mourning sound

It's the sound of distant shots and passing trucks

We walked with the mourning sound

It's the sound of distant shots and passing trucks

I'll own our fate

Could never deny

This isn't a place

Where I can even try

I'll haul it away

I do it all the time

Let love age

And watch it burn out and die

We walked with the mourning sound

It's the sound of distant shots and passing trucks

We walked with the mourning sound

It's the sound of distant shots and passing trucks

We walked with the mourning sound

It's the sound of distant shots and passing trucks

--

Jostain syystä on eilen ja tänään ollu tosi väsynyt olo ja paikat on fyysisesti ollu tosi kipeinä. Mistä lie johtuu.

Avalanche

 Song of the day;;

→ Angus & Julia Stone - Big Jet Plane (Radio Edit)

She said, hello, mister, pleased to meet ya

I wanna hold her, I wanna kiss her

She smelled of daisies, she smelled of daisies

She drive me crazy, she drive me crazy

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Be my lover, my lady river

Can I take ya, take ya higher?

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Gonna hold ya, gonna kiss ya in my arms

Gonna take ya away from harm

Gonna hold ya, gonna kiss ya in my arms

Gonna take ya away from harm

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

Hey, hey

--

Huomenna fysioterapia (luojan kiitos vasta 14:15 niin ei tarvi herätä at the ass crack of dawn) jonka jälkeen pitäis käydä apteekissa. Ja joo, kyllä, olis pitäny käydä alkuviikosta mutta enpä jaksanu.

What you need

 Song of the day;;

→ The Devil Wears Prada - Chemical

Wakin' up to no meaning, I stare at the ceiling

Count the imperfections that surround my bein'

Can tell how I'm feelin'

And it hurts more when you ask

There's a hole in my head and heart (Heart, heart, heart)

But I'm a long way from the start

There's a hole in my head and heart (Heart, heart, heart)

But I'm a long way from

Back when I couldn't move, was frozen

I told myself it's all good

It's only chemical (Oh-woah)

It's only chemical (Oh-woah)

It's only chemical

I'm too shy to speak up

Guess I have my reasons for telling little lies

About those around me and what I could be

It's eating me alive

There's a hole in my head and heart (Heart, heart, heart)

But I'm a long way from the start

There's a hole in my head and heart (Heart, heart, heart)

But I'm a long way from

Back when I couldn't move, was frozen

I told myself it's all good

It's only chemical (It's only chemical, it's only chemical)

I want to scream, but it won't help

I've created my own hell

And it's only chemical (Oh-woah, oh-woah, oh-woah)

It's only chemical (Oh-woah)

It's only chemical

I find comfort when they say

You can't sit and count the days, until it ends

There's still times I wanna break

Everything I've ever made

But I've come a long way from

I've come a long way from

Back when I couldn't move, was frozen

I told myself it's all good

It's only chemical (It's only chemical, it's only chemical)

I want to scream but it won't help

I've created my own hell

And it's only chemical

It's only chemical (Oh-woah)

It's only chemical (Oh-woah)

It's only chemical (Oh-woah)

It's only chemical

Follow you

 Song of the day;;

→ Those Who Ride With Giants - The Whispering Caves

--

Tänään oli nätti aurinkokeli (vaikkakin aika kylmä mut eipä midist) joten kävin lenkillä, teki hyvää.

Doomed

 Song of the day;;

→ The Dumplings - Raj

Jak wygląda mój raj

Jak wygląda mój raj

Z którego nie uciekam

Gdzie dzień uprzejmym jest

Gdzie dzień uprzejmym jest

Choć o to sama nie dbam

Jak wygląda mój raj

Jak wygląda mój raj

Za którym chce się tęsknić

Gdzie noc uprzejmą jest

Gdzie noc uprzejmą jest

Nikt nie chce tam mnie zranić

W bezruchu czas

Wolniej płynie mi

Czuję że mniej znów jestem tu

W bezruchu czas

Wolniej płynie mi

Czuję że mniej znów jestem tu

Piękne miejsce i stan

Piękne miejsce i stan

Tak lubię marzyć o nim

Choć dawno nie byłam tam

Choć dawno nie byłam tam

Myślę - wrócę niebawem

Piękne miejsce i stan

Piękne miejsce i stan

Tak lubię marzyć o nim

Choć dawno nie byłam tam

Choć dawno nie byłam tam

Myślę - wrócę niebawem

Jak wygląda mój raj

Jak wygląda mój raj

Piękne miejsce i stan

Piękne miejsce i stan

Piękne miejsce i stan

W bezruchu czas

Wolniej płynie mi

Czuję że mniej znów jestem tu

W bezruchu czas

Wolniej płynie mi

Czuję że mniej znów jestem tu

--

Hyvää huhtikuuta kaikille!