BLOOD RED ROSES.

  Song of the day;; → Hollywood Undead - Medicate They say we're dope sick (Dope sick) On a carousel, up in the clouds I'm feeling so slick (So slick) Take a shot if you want, but I ain't coming back down It's just another day, another one that got away The kids are never gonna change their minds They say we're dope sick (Dope sick) 'Cause we're dope sick (Dope sick) I try to love myself today But I'll hate myself tomorrow I'm so predictable It's such a hard pill to swallow I better medi-medi, better medicate Medi-medi, better medicate Medi-medi, better medicate I might be dying but I feel just fine They say we're hopeless (Hopeless) That we're lost and we'll never be found We're out of focus (Focus) But not another face in the crowd It's just another day, another one that got away The kids are never gonna change their minds They say we're hopeless (Hopeless) 'Cause we're hopeless (Hopeless) I try to love myself to

  Song of the day;; → OK Go - A Million Ways Sit back, matter fact Teasing, toying, turning, chatting Charming, hissing, playing the crowd Play that song again 'Nother couple Klonopin A nod, a glance, a half-hearted bow Oh, such grace Oh, such beauty And lipstick and callous and fishnets and malice Oh, darling You're a million ways to be cruel (One-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero) You're a million ways to be cruel (One-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero) You're a million ways to be cruel I should, I wish I could Maybe if you were, I would A list of standard-issue regrets One last eighty proof Slouching in the corner booth Baby, it's as good as it gets Oh, such grace Oh, such beauty So precious, suspicious, and charming, and vicious Oh, darling You're a million ways Oh, darling You're a million ways to be cruel (One-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero) You're a million ways to be cruel (One-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero-zero) You're a million ways to be cruel Oh, darli

  Song of the day;; → Alaskan Tapes - We 

  Song of the day;; → Hollywood Undead - Ghost Out Yeah, yeah Way back when, I remember back then I had a couple dollars but I really needed ten I started plotting and scheming, grinding, bleeding I ain't fucking dying, you can bank on it, believe it Yeah, born at the bottom, but I'm dying at the top And I don't give a fuck how many fucking bodies have to drop 911, yeah, someone call the cops 'Cause this motherfucker here ain't never gonna stop Everything I touch turns to gold now I'm the dope man, so I'm dope now You can call me, I never sold out I just need to make a mil' before I ghost out Everything I touch turns to gold now I'm the dope man, so I'm dope now You can call me, I never sold out I just need to make a mil' before I ghost out Looking through the peephole, I'm seeing dead people I'm stuck full of needles like a fucking Saw sequel I'm praying at the steeple, I'm never going legal I got a room where my weed grow, i

  Song of the day;; → Ludovico Einaudi - Nuvole bianche

  Song of the day;; → Nobuo Uematsu - FFVII REMAKE: The Prelude - Reunion

  Song of the day;; → Hollywood Undead & Hyro The Hero - Comin' Thru The Stereo I am in my own lane, you and me are not the same You a pain in the ass, I'm a major pain to the brain In my old age, I'll be pimping with my cane Big gold rope chain, flossing in the hall of fame Yeah, I wanna be the G.O.A.T., better be cautious, don't approach Something like a magic show, all this fire in my throat, ha No Barnum & Bailey but I am crazy, I got two sides like Slim Shady If you fuck around then it's rock-a-bye baby, I'm amazing Prepared for any occasion, ready for any situation I comes out with guns blazing I'm chilling, I ain't chasing, complex, never basic That sound in the background is me in my spaceship I'm going to the top and nobody's gonna stop me now Another nightmare and it's coming through the stеreo Keep going till I drop, till the hands on the clock run out Anothеr nightmare and it's coming through the stereo Straight out th

  Song of the day;; → The Libertines - Gunga Din Woke up again to my chagrin Getting sick and tired of feeling sick and tired again I tried to write, because I got the right To make it look as if I'm doing something with my life Got to find a vein, it's always the same And a drink to ease the panic and the suffering I woke up again Dreamt of Gunga Din Oh, the road is long If you stay strong You're a better man than I You've been beaten and flayed Probably betrayed You're a better man than I Woke up again to my evil twin The mirror is fucking ugly and I'm sick and tired of looking at him Been up all night, I'll probably pick a fight 'Cause I can't help it, I'm bastard in the morning So I try to write, I think I have the right A little drink-y now and then to help me just to see the light Just another day, it feels like nothing's changed Oh fuck it, oh here I go again Oh, the road is long If you stay strong You're a better man than I You

Song of the day;; → Dajwin - acsenzion -- Terapiapäivä. Lokakuussa lääkäri. 

  Song of the day;; → One Morning Left - Neon Highway Starry sky of satellites We live and we die for these nights These nights of love and lust Crawling through glass is worth the cuts 'Cause heaven and hell reside in us Thus, I'm never giving up I'm never giving up 'Cause we are meant to be Together Ride with me on this neon highway Forever Die with me on this neon highway Wind blew through your hair And I could only stare You're a walking piece of art I'll go anywhere Ride a road to nowhere If you will fix my heart Die with me on this neon highway Cities drowned in neon lights We live and we die for these nights These nights of love and lust The devil and I, we made a deal I will find love if I carry His seal Thus, I'm never giving up I'm never giving up 'Cause we are meant to be Together Ride with me on this neon highway Forever Die with me on this neon highway Wind blew through your hair And I could only stare You're a walking piece of art I

  Song of the day;; → Franz Ferdinand - This Fire Eyes boring a way through me Paralyse, controlling completely Now there is a fire in me A fire that burns This fire is out of control I'm going to burn this city, burn this city This fire is out of control I'm going to burn this city, burn this city This fire is out of control We're going to burn this city, burn this city This fire is out of control We're going to burn it, I'll burn it, I, I, I'll burn it down Eyes burning a way through me Overwhelm, destroying so sweetly Now there is a fire in me A fire that burns This fire is out of control I'm going to burn this city, burn this city This fire is out of control I'm going to burn this city, burn this city This fire is out of control We're going to burn this city, burn this city This fire is out of control Then I'm, I'm out of control and I burn Oh, how I burn for you Burn, oh, how I burn for you Burn, how I burn How I burn, oh, how I This fir

  Song of the day;; → Jean Sibelius, Jian Wang & Göran Söllscher - Etude Op. 76 nr 2

 Kello on tällä punaisella minuutilla 14:52. On sunnuntai, 19. syyskuuta vuonna 2021. Istun harvinaisesti huoneessani, enkä keittiön pöydän ääressä. Spotify soittaa taustalla DON BROCOn Manchester Super Reds No.1 Fania (viime aikoina olen kuunnellut kyseistä bändiä aika paljon, kuuluu ehdottomasti suosikkeihin tällä hetkellä; uudet biisit on aikamoisia bangereita). Heräsin tänään yhdeltätoista. Verensokeri oli kolmantena aamuna peräkkäin niin matalalla herätessä, että meinasi olla huono olo. En ihan satavarmasti tiedä mistä tämä nyt taas johtuu, mutta opin jo vuosia sitten, ettei tätä sairautta kannata yrittää ymmärtää. Kun luulet oppineesi jonkun käyttäytymismallin, päättää se heittää täysin toisen vaihteen silmään. Ei siis maksa vaivaa. Söin aamupalaksi muroja ja katsoin telkkaria sivusilmällä selaillessani tumppua ja instaa. Puin päälle, siivoilin hieman. Pelasin vähän pleikkarilla ja koitin kerrata ruotsia, mutta mistään ei oikein tunnu tulevan mitään. Mikään ei huvita. Haluaisin l

  Song of the day;; → Abandon All Ships - Take One Last Breath Take one last breath You're about to jump to your death You're about to jump to your death Sail away from the shoreline Sail away from the shore I'm in front of Heaven's door Sail away from the shoreline Sail away from the shore I'm in front of Heaven's door Captain, captain Before the sail rips Captain, captain I can see enemy ships Captain, captain Before the sail rips Gasp for air Abandon all ships The current's strong The waves will rise The binding chains made me realize Sin is the anchor, holding you down I'm on a cruise to Paradise I'm done with sin I've paid my price God is your captain Change your direction Abandon all ships We'll part the sea Choose your side Don't come with me You decide We'll part the sea Don't come with me Sail away from the shoreline Sail away from the shore I'm in front of Heaven's door Look what we've built, walking the plan

  Song of the day;; → Foals - Tron Away, away from this system, there is Another country place we could go Away, away from this system, there is Another country place we could go Away, away from this system, there is A flower shop by which I mean to say Away, away from this system, there is Another country place we could go Away, away, away, away, away, away, away If something won't heal, our children can't help you out If something won't heal, our children can't help you out If something won't heal, a compass can't help you out If something won't heal, our children can't help you out Away, away from this system, there is A flower shop by which I mean to say Away, away from this system, there is Another country place we could go Away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away, away Waste is a waste Waste is a waste Waste is a, waste is a, waste is a waste Waste is a

  Song of the day;; →  Gareth Malone, Gareth Malone's Voices, Catrin Finch & Royal Philharmonic Orchestra - Walking In The Air - From ''The Snowman'' We're walking in the air We're floating in the moonlit sky The people far below Are sleeping as we fly I'm holding very tight I'm riding in the midnight blue I'm finding I can fly So high above with you Far across the world The villages go by like dreams The rivers and the hills The forests and the streams Children gaze open-mouthed Taken by surprise Nobody down below Believes their eyes We're surfing in the air We're swimming in the frozen sky We're drifting over icy Mountains floating by Suddenly swooping low On an ocean deep Rousing up a mighty monster From his sleep We're walking in the air We're dancing in the midnight sky And everyone who sees us Greets us as we fly -- Tajusin vasta lääkärin eteen istuessani, että olin muistanut asioita aivan päin persettä. Ei se tämä l

  Song of the day;; → The Luminary - Apparition You’ll never know Lost alone I sink deeper Left like a ghost, I’m cursed with obsession Lower Lower than the lie you’ve led to end this condition Oh, I’ve lost my way You led me astray And now I’m on my own And I can’t look away Twisted by a lover's band Painted in gold with stories untold I read between all your lies I’ve been following the signs You’ll never know A perfect tension that held all of us in place With every waking moment, we survive this empty space Oh, I’ve lost my way You never meant to run away You led me astray And now it can’t be erased Left to decipher the ones who never loved me (Clarity) I can see all my past, it’s just a memory (Memory) I’ve become a vessel to carry all the ones I’ve lost Oh, eidolon, what have I become? (Lost) You’ve led me astray for far too long Falling structures collapse around me Oh, I’ve lost my way You led me astray And now I’m haunted by your memory Oh, I’ve lost my way You never meant

  Song of the day;; → Hozier - Arsonist's Lullabye When I was a child, I heard voices Some would sing and some would scream You soon find you have few choices I learned the voices died with me When I was a child, I'd sit for hours Staring into open flame Something in it had a power Could barely tear my eyes away All you have is your fire And the place you need to reach Don't you ever tame your demons But always keep them on a leash When I was sixteen, my senses fooled me Thought gasoline was on my clothes I knew that something would always rule me I knew this scent was mine alone All you have is your fire And the place you need to reach Don't you ever tame your demons Always keep them on a leash When I was a man, I thought it ended When I knew love's perfect ache But my peace has always depended On all the ashes in my wake All you have is your fire And the place you need to reach Don't you ever tame your demons But always keep them on a leash -- Väsyttää, niin k

  Song of the day;; → Stephan Moccio - Carol of the Bells (arr. piano) -- Ai miten niin on liian aikasta laittaa joululauluja? Ei tasan ole. Huomenna terapiaan, sen jälkeen luento. Keskiviikkona ei mitään, torstaina lääkäri. 

  Song of the day;; → Gutter King - Feather Just a memory to me Just a memory to me Love, what if I told you I’ve been sinking in my sleep? Still lost in that moment, just a fading memory And I would do anything just to feel close to you And I would give everything just to rewrite the truth I wish you could stay one more night ‘Cause I’m over the edge and I can’t hold this back Won’t you stay one more night? I still can’t believe you’re a memory to me I’ve been silently trying to hold on to fractions of images And light as a feather the sound of your breathing clouds m My mind Is this a dream? I wish you could stay one more night ‘Cause I’m over the edge and I can’t hold this back Won’t you stay one more night? I still can’t believe you’re a memory to me Take it away My sight or your face I can’t help but feel that I locked you away And slowly you fade, slowly you fade Last words don’t last, and my hands are bare But despite my hell I still feel you there I wish you could stay one more

  Song of the day;; → The Last Royals - Friday Night Awake, no confidence Expect, cold sweats again My earplugs hem me in As playground voices wear me thin Alive, I suppose so My mind, will overflow With doubts, as the crow flies 'Bout two across and thirteen high Oh, my baby says she wants to fall in love (Oh) Oh, I hope that I can deal with what may come (Whoa) Ah, it's Friday night, I’m feeling like a star (Oh) Oh, the light of day has never felt so far away, baby Oh boy, she loves me so And I want, her to and fro This means that I am free My soul, my masculinity Oh please come closer now We’ll make a life somehow Your looks, and my good nature Don’t even think, just sign the papers Oh, my baby says she wants to fall in love (Oh) Oh, I hope that I can deal with what may come (Oh) Ah, it's Friday night, I’m feeling like a star (Oh) Oh, the light of day has never felt so far away, baby She said oh, my baby says she wants to fall in love (Oh) She said oh, I hope that I can

  Song of the day;; → The KLF & The Justified Ancients of Mu Mu - Baltimore to Fair Play

  Song of the day;; → Farewell To Freeway - No Fate, No End I'm not breathing air There is no fate, there is no end I can't tell if your face is foe or friend Hear me now, this is not real Calmness washes over me Do you know who I am and who I will be? With endless possibilities And places that I'm caught between This isn't happening A decision made with no regrets It's all in my hands, no consequences This is my world, the fiction and reality Read my face, I'm alive This is not the time, this is not the place I remember, I can make it happen At least for a while, at least for a while Just for now Now time is wasting So no more hesitation, don't be afraid Don't be afraid, don't be afraid I, I wanted so much more than this You've always been part of this I'll never forget the nights we shared I swear I saw a light inside your eyes This is my world, the fiction and reality Read my face, I'm alive This is not the time, this is not the place

  Song of the day;; → MIYAVI & Daichi Miura - Dancing With My Fingers Dancing with my fingers Makes you wanna scream Na na na na na na Don’t stop　まだまだ   Dancing with my fingers Makes you wanna scream Na na na na na na Feels good everywhere   Dancing Scream out louder まだまだ   Dancing Scream out louder 止まらない   まだ足りない身体が まだ足りない心が 脳を揺らす　叫び声 このままに溺れていたい All day all night   物足りない　Your life 終わらせに来たんだろう？   Dancing with my fingers Makes you wanna scream Na na na na na na Don’t stop　まだまだ   Dancing with my fingers Makes you wanna scream Na na na na na na Feels good everywhere   Dancing Scream out louder まだまだ   Dancing Scream out louder 止まらない   もう元には戻れない もう他には意味がない 頭じゃ分かってても 気づけば反応してる I know it’s not right   想像できる様な事 ここじゃ役にたたない   Dancing with my fingers Makes you wanna scream Na na na na na na Don’t stop　まだまだ   Dancing with my fingers Makes you wanna scream Na na na na na na Feels good everywhere   Dancing Scream out louder まだまだ   Dancing Scream out louder 止まらない   Dancing   行けるところまで どこまでも　Let’s

  Song of the day;; → Steve Roach - Towards the Blue -- En oikiastaan muuta tehnyt tänään ko pelailin (ai että on ihanaa ollu pelata taas Final Fantasy XIII:tä!), tiskasin ja kävin kaupassa. Toki myös söin ja kattelin Netflixiä sekä BB:n tossa aikasemmin (eli siis kun se tuli telkkarista). Aamulla mulla on kello 9:30 se aika, joten herään varmaan jossain seittemältä, että kerkiän saaja ihteni ihmisen näköseksi (ei muuten, mutta mulla kestää yleensä n. tunti ennenko pääsen ees pukemaan päälle). Varmaan ko pääsen sieltä pois niin tuun takas kämpille, keitän teetä ja luen jotain ennenko otan päikkärit. Laitoin professorille sähköpostia siitä kurssista, toivottavasti se vastaa pian, että pääsen sitten tekemään muistiinpanoja ja muuta hommaa.

  Song of the day;; → Earthshatter - W.T.M. You're always looking out for yourself Shook my hand then you dragged me through fucking hell But I found my way out You're cold blooded I still let you under my skin Called you brother Now tell me where the fuck have you been? This bond was supposed weather any storm Fell apart during the faltering warmth Now I see what I meant to you Now they’ll see what you put me through I know that you left me behind (Left me behind) Why can't I see that you're a waste of (Waste of my time) I don't think that time can heal these wounds (Heal these wounds) You're everything and yet I'm nothing I'll never be like you You're so jaded I still let you under my skin Put your trust in demons I watched your hatred deepen within Sleepless nights plague your being to the core Now every day that you're awake I can't help but think I deserved more So fuck it Now I know that you left me behind (You left me behind) Why can&#

  Song of the day;; → Of Monsters and Men - Human When the words Weigh heavy on the heart I am lost And led only by the stars Cage me like an animal A crown with gems and gold Eat me like a cannibal Chase the neon throne Breathe in, breathe out; let the human in (Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-oh oh) Breathe in, breathe out and let it in (Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-oh oh) Plants awoke, and they slowly grow beneath the skin (Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-oh oh) So breathe in, breathe out; let the human in The air is silk Shadows form a grin If I lose control I feed the beast within Cage me like an animal A crown with gems and gold Eat me like a cannibal Chase the neon throne Breathe in, breathe out; let the human in (Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-oh oh) Breathe in, breathe out and let it in (Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-oh oh) Plants awoke, and they slowly grow beneath the skin (Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh-oh oh) So breathe in, breathe out; let the human in Cage me like an animal A crown with gems and gold Eat me like a cannibal Chase the neon th

  Song of the day;; → David Behrman - On the Other Ocean -- Täällä ollaan. Laittelin tuossa jo jonkin verran nuita vaatteita, mutta sitten iski laiskuus ja oli pakko pitää pieni teepaussi. Yritän saada nuo vaatteet nyt tänä iltana laiteltua, että huomenna voin keskittyä videopeleihin (sekä purkaa muut tavarat vielä). Ulkona alkaa olla jo sen verran viiliä ilma, että voisin myös vaihtaa tuohon eteiseen paksummat takit taas...

  Song of the day;; → The Parallel - Who I've Become Pressure builds, repeated failures View of self worth tainted from birth These words cut even said with a grin The sinking feelings set-in Can I alter nurture, change? Yet I always end up running from the truth Lost in static, melodramatic And every time I talk It makes me nervous But everything I’m doing has its place These patterns change and rearrange I’m learning who I’ve become Pressure builds, thunder fated Boom or bust I weather out Can’t catch my breath A dance with death Everything I wanted Tear apart the instinctive Been stitched with unforgiving patterns I fail to recognize I guess I’m just another slave to nurture Motivation leads to deflation Carry these feelings away You can’t make a decision Impacting life, causing strife Relapsing like I’m never changing Carve me in stone, is this really me? I can’t believe Maybe I’m naive Every time I talk It makes me nervous But everything I’m doing has its place These patterns

  Song of the day;; → Boy Sompob - Jigsaw Heart ฉันโยนหัวใจทิ้งไป และไม่คิดจะใช้มันอีกเลย ฉันโยนหัวใจทิ้งไป และไม่คิดหันหลังกลับไปมองเลย มันแตก ไปแล้ว แต่มีเธอที่เดินตามเศษของหัวใจ เธอต่อมันอีกครั้ง เธอทำให้ความรักมันเกิดขึ้นใหม่ เธอเก็บเอาความหวัง เธอเก็บความฝันใส่มันเข้าไป (You’ve completed my jigsaw heart) รู้ไหมไม่มีใครรู้ ว่าวันพรุ่งนี้จะเป็นเช่นไร แค่ขอมีเธอได้ไหม อยู่เคียงข้างฉันทุกลมหายใจ มันเคยแตก ไปแล้ว มีแค่เธอเดินตามเศษของหัวใจ เธอต่อมันอีกครั้ง เธอทำให้ความรักมันเกิดขึ้นใหม่ เธอเก็บเอาความหวัง เธอเก็บความฝันใส่มันเข้าไป (You’ve completed my jigsaw heart) You’ve picked it up, picked it up and fixed it for me You make me feel it right, you make me see the light Picked it up and picked it up and fixed it for me เธอต่อมันอีกครั้ง เธอทำให้ความรักมันเกิดขึ้นใหม่ เธอเก็บเอาความหวัง เธอเก็บความฝันใส่มันเข้าไป (You’ve completed my jigsaw heart) เธอต่อมันอีกครั้ง เธอทำให้ความรักมันเกิดขึ้นใหม่ เธอเก็บเอาความหวัง เธอเก็บความฝันใส่มันเข้าไป (You’ve completed my jigsaw heart) -- Sainki

  Song of the day;; → Doreem - Seele III -- Hyvää syyskuuta! Lauantaina ois tarkotus lähtiä takas Ouluun, koulu alkaa tiistaina ja sitä ennen pitäis keretä käymään hoitotarvikejakelussa ja kirjastossa. En tiedä mitä helvettiä tapahtuu, mutta mua ei oo opiskelu ahistanu näin paljon varmaan koskaan. En sitten tiiä johtuuko se siitä, että viime vuonna sai tavallaan olla rauhassa vaan kämpillä koko ajan, mutta jotenkin nyt viime aikoina olen vaan alkanut toivomaan, ettei olis mitään läsnäoloa vaativaa. En halua olla ihmisten joukossa. Ahdistaa niin saatanasti ja tekis mieli vaan itkeä koko ajan. Huomaatteko muuten, ettei kiinnostanut nyt vittujakaan mikään blogin teeman sopiminen syksyn tulemiseen-estetiikka?